Today has been pretty nutty... couple of rush jobs came in on top of doing new show posters and ads for the Bricktown Dog. Gonna head out that way tonight and catch the Forty Twenty Band tonight along with Stoney and Kevin. Maybe do a little recording (wink wink nudge nudge say no more say no more). But anyways... as promised, here are the funniest email subject lines I received this past week (plus my comments/thoughts on them):



Don't worry, it's not that BIG...you'll really think so! --- (hmmmm, either they're talking about a pecker or a needle)

Fist a friend! --- (this sounds like a new national holiday I don't want to miss)

H0T Milfs Hunted down and Conquered :) --- (I wonder what weapons they use)

How to Be a Jedi in One Easy Step --- (sign me up)

My stretched rectum --- (uuuhhhhh....hmmmmm)

Slutty girlfriends looking for money, $1000 and apply within. --- (I figure everybody's looking for money, whynot slutty girls?)

Toons take it in the Ass --- (I really hope they leave Looney Tunes out of this)

Tiny Little Asians Getting Stretched --- (I can't help but think this is some kind of torture device)

Tessie Luvs to Get Train'd --- (this could be some typo. Tessie likes working in restaurants maybe?)

watch her squirt !!! slick surrenders --- ( a video of a chick with a water gun and fires it a "slick" which in turn causes him to surrender)

White Bimbos Riding Big Doinks --- (a funny nickname or some kind of new species of animal?)

Handjob May Be Fun! --- (they forgot to put a space here. I figured it to be some kind of hand modeling work like for a jewelry store ad.)

Sup my homies?.... I have updated my "about me" page for all you peoples. Peep this page for all the rare, hard to get info about yours truly...... word is bond.

So, Matt and I were discussing this morning about how funny some subject lines in porn emails are. Every now and then one slips through our junk filter cuz they use either scrambled words or they make up a new nick name for "penis" or "vagina". Some are actually funny enough to make me open them. For example SUBJECT: Fist a Friend...... so I go "I gotta see what this whole 'fist a friend' deal is about." Like I'm missing some new Fist a Friend Holiday or something. That made me curious to see what other subject lines ther were. So, every now and then I probe through my Junk Box (no pun intended..... or maybe?) and see which ones are funny. I think now, every Friday, I will post the week's funniest porn email subject lines. They may be filled with a curse word or various graphic verbs and adjectives, so be aware. If it offends you...... don't read it...... but I have a feeling the people that read this blog don't really get offended too easily.

THIS JUST IN!!! A new photo sent back from the Mars Rover "Opportunity"! You've got to see it to believe it!

mars.jpg

Now, I want everybody to sit down now, before I tell tell you some exciting news...... everybody down?..... good. It sounds like it will be annouced this week that Sammy Hagar is reuniting with Van Fuckin' Halen!!!!! It apparently was leaked by Jeff Keith, lead singer of Tesla, cuz it sounds like they are in talks with Tesla being the opening band. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???? VAN HALEN AND TESLA?!?!?! I'm gonna be front row baby!To me, this concert would be a lot cooler than the Aerosmith/Kiss show. I'll pay big bucks to see 'em again.

I gotta get this off my chest here.... this is an open letter to ALL WOMEN....

Please, do not try to dress us men. We know your intentions are good. We know we may not look like what you want us to.... but that's the beauty of it. We're cool anyway. The only way a woman can dress me is if I'm on one of those A&E, Discovery, or TLC shows where they give you like a zillion dollars to go buy clothes. I'm a "t-shirt and jeans" guy, but at least I tuck in my shirt most of the time and I still look dead sexy..... yeah hardcore.... you know it. Plus if we could dress women like we want, you'd be running around in nothing but various sexy uniforms that men like to see women in (i.e. nurse, catholic school girl, nun, police officer, roofer) or lingerie like crotchless panties and those bras with the nipples cut..... those are cherry. So, I say leave well enough alone unless we specifically ask.



Yours Truly,

Da Man Wit Da Plan

I hate snow... I hate cold weather.... I hate the way people drive in snow. People are stupid. I want warm temps. Snow is cool for about 3 days... and thats only if you ski in it. Is 80 degrees too much to ask year-round. Mexico sounds nice right now.

Gotta full week ahead of me.... Finishing up some new Bricktown Dog designs.... then onto some new Badwater designs..... then some Travis Kidd designs...... finish off with a tattoo design. These aren't gonna be ordinary designs. These are gonna be some shirts you'll wanna buy your grandparents for Easter to wear to church. Yeah, they'll be that good. I love my job. I just want to design for bands and bars..... thats all.

Saturday night kicked ass. Bricktown Wormy Dog was at capacity for the Great Divide. Before the show that day, I wondered into Guitar Center to look at some recording equip. for my little ole comptuer. Well, I got the "band hookup" or rather the "bar hookup". I am now offically in the live recording business. It was an experiment Saturday night. Recorded the opening band, Tucker Road, and tried a couple of different recording appplications until I found the one that works best. The Divide went on next and I did get 18 sweet and delicious tracks.... I can't release them of course until JJ says I can or he'll beat me up real hard. But, it does sound pretty damn good. I may post a little preview later... like the intro or something... who knows.

So, we went to Cattlemens to eat and *poof* Chuck Thompson was there.

Weekend Plans (for anyone who gives a shit): Tonight, have dinner with Melisa's folks at Cattleman's for her dad's b-day. It's up in the air for anything to do after that. Peter Dawson is at the Bricktown Dog tonight. I keep hearing he's bad ass. Tomorrow, Melisa goes to her grandparents to make her veil. I go to Gingiss Formal Wear to get measure for a tux for Lisa's wedding and then see if they have any cool Zoot Suits for my wedding. Have lunch with my mom. Go to a travel agant and see if any of these superclubs.com are worth a shit for our honeymoon. Then, off to the Dizzog for a little Great Divide action. If you come out to the show give ole JJ (and Tommie Lee) a crongratulations on their new baby boy Jevyn. That's a killer ass name. I don't think anyone will fuck with a kid with that name.... now, anybody called "JJ" you can fuck with all the time. Sunday is lunch with my dad at his place in Edmond. That is all... over the hizzle and out fo shizzle..... man I can never get tired of the "izzles".

I just gotta say The Bangles have ALWAYS kicked ass (and are still). I still have the hots for Susanna Hoffs. Rock n roll....

Lookin' through some old "polaroids" of my car I found this little gem. My dad and I standing in front of a monster truck before the show that night. I believe I was in 7th grade in this pic.... had my sweet black Chuck Taylor's on too!

Boy I sure do miss my car...



4 bolt main.... 350 c.i..... bored .30 over.... 290 cam with half inch lift..... 10.5 to 1 compression.... Turbo 350 trans with a shift kit.... 108 octane leaded gas..... 375 HP.....



My "Mustang Killer"....



I miss her...... BAD

Here's a pic from a lovely lady up in New York City, Heidi, who went to see Ragweed last at the Mercury Lounge there.



Are you seein' the guitar strap??? Fuckin' bad ass. New York City??? Wow.... all I got to say.

Taking the image idea from Ryin, here's my two monitor tale..... Once there was this handsome prince who...... oh fuck it..... this is pic of my desk "right now"



I guess you all can play "Name What's on the Table".

Aaaawwww yeah! Guess who's coming April 3rd??? Go on guess!....... OK I'm sick of waiting..... It's Kid "Muthafuckin'" Rock. Thats right, Big Pimp is comin' to town and I'm bustin' out my party hat. Who's with me?...... ARE YOU WITH ME HERE?!?!

I'm so ready to drink myself in a drunken stooper. Looks like I'll be heading to the "Ol' Waterin' Hole" tonight. Hang some posters, shoot merch pics with Kevin, deliver the new "Dead Design" Stragglers shirts and panties, and drink many many frosty cold adult beverages.

Gonna geek out on you people for a minute.... We just got our Epson Expression 1640XL Color Image Scanner..... 11x17!!!! It's a fuckin' monster!

Finally! Someone has come out with a GOOD reality show. I watched it last night and couldn't stop laughing. Its always fun to laugh at someone's torment. Especially when its a snooty girl gettin' shit from one helluva cool guy. This dude is the standard by which all men should live. I know I do and I love it!

All the pics be up in tha hizzle....

Alright people... I've got like, an assload of pics I'll be putting up today. Badwater from Jan. 10 and Bleu Edmondson and Stragglers from this past weekend. Until then, here's a rundown of what I can recall from the past three days. Friday, show up at the Bricktown Dog for Bleu Edmondson and his boys with the Kyle Hunt Band opening. I've never heard Kyle sing before but his band was tight as fuck. His show kind of reminded me of early Pat Green stuff. Pretty good. Then Bleu came on with two full drum kits on stage and blew the damn doors off. We had our crew in full party effect. Even had a sweet shot of Cabo to enhance the mood. We shut 'er down and went home.

Saturday, Melisa and I get up and go do our wedding registry at Target and Linens-n-Things. That was fun. You get to go up and request a gun. Some people look at you strange when you say you need a gun to shoot products. I was pretty dangerous with that thing, but not as dangerous as Melisa. She shot her eye. It was kinda funny. We do all that shit and get ready for the Stragglers' show at the Brewery. Let me tell you folks, I hate the Brewery, but it was one hell of a party nonetheless. Jeff Hobbs band opened up. Didn't get a chance to catch them but I've heard they're pretty good. Come to find out later on, the rythm guitar player, Jon Hanson, was a guy from Ardmore. I went to high school with his sister. Crazy stuff meeting people from my hometown and finding out they're in the music biz. Randy Roger's band was up next. Really didn't get a chance to see them but I heard 'em as we were backstage consuming various and somewhat numerous alcoholic beverages. Found out Dub Miller's old kick ass fiddle player, Brady Black, plays with Randy now. I think he's the best I've seen. Don't think anyone can touch him. So Boland and the boys take over and it turned to be a virtual plethora of musical talent on stage as you will see in the pics. Brady got up with Randy Crouch and had some dueling fiddles during the show. Boland stage dove... Red got up and played some guitar.... it was one helluva night. I'll let ya know when pics are posted.

Wow... the 30-40 people that were at the Bricktown Wormy Dog last night got a treat. Brandon Jenkins played with his "new" band. It was only their second show togther. Even saw some familiar faces in his new band. David Teegarden and Soupbone, who, if any of you are familiar with Tulsa and Stillwater music from a few years back, played with Freakshow. A new guy by the name of Joey Trevino layed down the bass line. I had brought my camera to take pics but my happy ass forgot the memory card. Brandon has found himself one bad ass band. They had a video made a while back. You can find it on Underground Planet. It was nominated for best video for some awards. Can't quite remember... I guess I was drinking. They're playing at the Red Dirt Cafe tonight but alas, we'll be returning to the Dog for Bleu Edmondson. BTW, Hank 3 canceled the Green Door last night cuz he didn't get his 2 pounds of cheese, pint of jack, and pedia-lite.

Yeah, oh shit, Hank 3 & Assjack is next door to the Dog tonight at the Green Door. Should be a knock down drag out rock n roll party in the street.

Looks like we'll be trekkin' down to watch a little Brandon Jenkins at the Bricktown Dog tomorrow night. So everyone around should come out and support one of Oklahoma's greatest singer/songwriters. Need a Jenkins fix. Haven't seen him in a while.

I have 5 mp3 cd's worth of live Phish shows I got off a used iPod I bought on ebay. Let me know if any of you people want them. There are like 15 min. to 30 min. songs on some. I get tired of songs after about 4 min.

OK, I know a couple of weeks back I told you all about an internet radio station called Generation Rock Radio, which is just what it says..... rock. Well, I found the other side of the music I (and I know most of everybody else) like. Its called Boot Liquor Radio. Old School country and drinkin' songs along with stuff like Robert Earl Keen, Lyle Lovett, even Roger Clyne and The Peacemakers (which are coming to the Bricktown Dog next month). Basically it sounds like all the influences of all the local bands that have now gotten, well, you know, well known. Its a cool station so I thought I'd pass it along. Its a good "Fuck Nashville" station!

I hate/am tired of Linkin Park. They suck. I usually don't say anything negative... but they crawl in my skin and the pain IS real.

So, on my lunch here, I found this band, Battlestar America, on cdbaby.com. These guys are "country hip-hop"..... yes you read that right. Check them out though. You'll be surprised. Its like Gram Parsons meets Outkast. On a more traditonal note, Thomas Fraser recorded his music on a traditional reel-to-reel. All recorded on a little island north of Scotland where he was born. I'm suprised I haven't heard of him before... since he's already dead. Sounds completely bad ass. Check it yo!

Can't do a big update today. Flyin' solo here at work and I gotta get some shit done. Matt's dad is getting a pacemaker "installed" today, so he'll be out for a couple of days. Make sure your prayers and whatnots are with him. He'll be ok.... hell everybody gets pacemakers. I think I need one to slow down my partyin'..... or maybe to speed me up? Saw the movie Big Fish yesterday. One of the best flicks I've seen in a long time. Great movie about how "storytelling" enriches our lives even if they're not quite true. Tim Burton is a master of imagery. Now I've been known to cry at movies, even on TV, but this one..... you better have a full box of tissue at the end cuz I even cried after it was over..... since I'm a sensitive guy and all. I highly suggest you see this movie. Rock on and have a good day.

TGIFF everybody! I'll let you figure out what the extra "F" is. A couple of random thoughts. Have I told you people how bad-ass Nickelback is? Can't not take The Long Road CD out of my player. Favorite song right now.... "See You at The Show". Such is the life of rock stars. Why do people who enjoy staying up at night call themselves "Night Owls"? Isn't that a little redundant? Is there such a thing as Day Owls. I thought owls were nocturnal. Hmmmmm..... I have no idea whats goin' on.

I wish people on Oklahoma radio stations would quit talking about the Sugar Bowl game and making up excuses on why OU lost. They're trying to pin the blame on somebody and let me tell you.... it ain't gonna work. Here is what happened at the Sugar Bowl..... The Sooners got beat by a better team. Its no ones fault.... no exuses can be made. They just happen to be #3 now and not #1. Deal with it you peckers.

So, I heard on the news this morning that there is a guy that's not happy with the whole 9-11 Memorial design. He said it is a design of minimalization. Well all I got to say is WTF?. The solid glass building and reflecting pools aren't enough?!?! Do we need like a solid gold disco ball with lasers and flashing lights??? This memorial is said to cost $12 billion over the next decade! I know you can't please everybody but shit.... minimalization my ass.

Ya'll check out one of the best damn songwriters that has ever lived. The intro to the site runs down the span of his music and check out this killer killer ass video with one of my personal favorite songs of his. I swear to fuck, if you get a chance to see him, its one enlightening experience. He's done it all people. I have lots of memories from his music.

I just want to say that all the craziness that went on last week was due to the fact that my lovely fiance, Melisa, was out in Virginia visiting her sister. It was kind of funny when I thought about it, but when she was crossing the OK/AR border on I-40 back into OK, we were doing the same thing...... only leaving. It was like I was sayin' "Oh snap! Melisa is coming back! Let's go get fucked up in Arkansas!" Anyways, I missed her and she missed out on a lot of good times. Although she wouldn't have lasted.



Oh and I also noticed yesterday that I hadn't added the Hosty Duo to my bands links. I fucked up on that one. They were one of the first live bands I saw when I moved to Stillwater around '95-'96 and I've loved them ever since. Almost eight years I've watched them. Like Kevin says, "Man how time flies".



Rock n Roll

Fayetteville Fotos are up..... I'm outty.

So here we are. Part Dos of last week which is about only one night. Less than 24 hours even. I want to know what it is about Arkansas that whenever I end up there, its like a Todd Snider song "I'm gonna hit this town til its teeth come out." I swear. Anyways, the Texas Jack boys call me at about 11:15AM Saturday morning and say they'll meet me at the Love's on 122nd St. around 2:30 of 3..... time passes as it does, you know, cuz you can't stop it. I've tried. Meet up them them and head to Fayetteville to meet up with Badwater for the evening's big show. I gotta say, I was pretty excited. These are two of my favorite bands right now and they've never seen each other play. So, we get to Fayetteville and Poncho has been riding with me from about Tulsa on. I teel him and the rest of the guys "Yeah, I been to Fayetteville. I kinda know the way. It'll come back to me once I get there." Well, it didn't come back. I halfway expected to just "follow the signs". Well, let me tell ya. There are no fuckin' city signs, street signs, or even bathroom signs in Arkansas. Nothing that said Fayetteville this way or that way. Well, we stop and get directions. This is about the time I start to realize Poncho and I don't make a very good Lewis and Clark. We end up following Ricky instead of me leading and finally found Dave's on Dickson. The Badwater guys are already there loading in and Texas Jack does the same. Sound check comes and goes for both bands and we decide to get motel rooms. Again, we get directions and Poncho climbs in with me and Ricky, Mark, Shannon, and Shane following behind. As soon as I pull out of the lot, we take the wrong turn and go all the way to where Dickson St. dead ends. We're just trying to fing College St., turn right or left and the Days Inn is four or five stop lights, it'll be on your right or left. See what I mean? Not good navigatiors. We get the Days Inn and the guy tells us where the rooms are and Poncho and I find a liquor store. That wasn't hard at all. We passed about 20 of them on the way to the motel. Got a bottle of Jager and some and head back to the motel. Well....... we even get lost in the damn motel parking lot!....... fuck. Find the rooms drink some beers and head back to the bar, which is a typical Fayetteville evening..... who cares what the hell else goes on, let's get drunk as shit. Texas Jack hits the stage to a massive crowd of tens and tens of people. I tell you what though, that's the best I've heard them sound. Even though they re-strung their guitars right before the show and tuned all night. Seriously, they kicked ass. Had a couple of new songs too I haven't heard. "Ghost of a Man" and "American Dream". Those could be some hits people. Ask for 'em when you see them. Badwater goes on a little later and again blew me away. All night, while each of the bands played, there were a lot of "Holy Shit"s and "What the Fuck"s being thrown around by band members who weren't playing. It completely rules seeing bands in awe of each other. I think they are a good pair of bands to play together, no matter who opens or closes. So, show ends everybody says their good-byes and see ya soons and we hit Taco Bell real hard before calling it an eveing. It was a balls to the wall party. You can see from the pics that are getting ready to be posted. I'm glad I got to be a part of it. Both bands have some of the greatest guys you could meet. Reminds me of all the good times in this music scene and why I love it. Great things are gonna be coming their ways soon this year I believe. See ya down the road.... ( man, I think I sounded like Monty there)

Photos are up from the afore mentioned shows. Texas Jack and Badwater soon to follow.

Wow.... what a fuckin' haze last week was. I successfully drank every damn night. Let's have a "quick" rundown.... Monday, Kevin calls me and says "let's go drinkin'". OK, so we ended up at Jess's house in OKC to drink. Tuesday, Matt says "let's go drinkin'". OK, so we ended up at the Stillwater Elks Lodge. Jerry, Patrick and Aaron joined in on the festivities as well. So, Wednesday rolls around.... New Years Eve Day. Little slow of rollin' out of bed. I'm hell bent on getting to the Bricktown Dog early as I have their New years shirts to deliver. Everybody seemed to be working that day and getting there til later... except Ashly. I call her up and she says she's in for the long haul. Pick her up and we get there a little after 4. The bands are loading in, doin' sound check and all..... of course I start drinking. Doors open at about 7 and I'm on my way to party some balls off. Wormy Dog Allstars kick it off about 8-8:30ish (the "ish being me starting to lose track of time). Jake and Chad belted out some good tunes to get people ready for Badwater. So Badwater gets up and and completely kicks ass. Bobby's got a new tune called "Oklahoma Song" that is totally killer with the band. Now, keep in mind while all this is going on, I'm still drinking away. I believe No Justice took stage next.... yes, yes they did. This is where it gets a little hazy. I remember going upstairs above the stage and talking with Eric from McClure's band and Kevin. Apparently it was like a whole other party up there. Beer is being delivered by the cases and blah, blah, blah. Well, I end up missing the whole No Justice show. Didn't even take one picture. I was a little pissed at myself although no one noticed. Head back down for McClure's show. And what a show it was. I had a moment of clarity while they were playing. I use the term "clarity" loosely. I remember there were many Red Headed Sluts and Pieces of Ass being taken. Mr. Jager showed up a couple of times and Kevin and I were jumping up and down backstage rocking out with the band. What a fuckin' good time. Those guys kicked it hard that night. They were done show was over and I was done. Now, I have to give a big shout out to Ashly for stickin' it out with us the entire time and letting me crash and sober up at her place before I headed back to Guthrie. She, along with many others, partied like rock stars. So here we are now, New Years Day....... sleep. Thats it.Friday, January 2nd now. Host Duo is playing at the Bricktown Dog. I haven't seen those guys in forever. I love Hosty's shit. They are only one of three bands that can get me to dance. I don't think he's ever written a bad song and TicTac is one of the best drummers I've ever been privileged to know. All drummers need to come out and watch what he does. We bullshit around and play catch-up until they go on. I wasn't planning on turning it into a "party night", but guess what..... it was. Closed down the Dog, headed over to Robert and Jeff's place and drink Irish fucking whiskey til 6AM watching the Tenacious D DVD....... fuck! I get home at 7AM and crash. 11:15AM.....Texas Jack calls me up ans says just leaving Vernon, TX and are headed my way.



Part 2, verse 3, chapter 4, Jackson 5, Nikki 6, 7 Spanish Angels, 8 Is Enough, 9 Inch Nails, 10 Gallon Hat..... coming up later.